Yeah, I gave mine a .38 Rossi for her birthday a couple of years after we were married. I was always on the road trucking and thought she might feel better protected. I heard about that all the way up to the time we were divorced, 20 years later.
Ha! I can beat that! I was first married and working laying asphalt. Came home one summer night just fried from working in literally boiling hot oil all day. Sitting in my chair just trying to cool off and watch the TV when here comes the wife. She stands in front of me and starts whining about having to go out that night after dark to conduct a sales party for multi level stuff across town at a woman's house. The XYL wanted me to go with since the town was having a rash of what we know call car jacking, but in these cases, the women driving wound up dead in a field. Now going out after the day I've had working in a crock pot getting slow cooked all day, was the last thing I wanted.
So I just blurted out the first thing that came to mind:
"Don't worry, Hon. They'll let you go as soon as they get you under strong light."
I wound up in the maximum security wing of that there dog house! Took a really long time to get out. I still get the shiverin' never-get-overs just thinking about it 30+ years later.
My first time at a near-admission to the dog house was when I got my wife a chain saw for Christmas. Yes, a chain saw. But we really, really needed it because we were trying to heat our house with a wood-fired furnace... and you gotta have a chain saw to cut wood, right?
The thing that saved it for me was the "real gift" of some jewelry or other doo-dad shiny thing. I don't recall what that was, but I still have the saw.
PS: She got me back a few years later by sending a funeral arrangement (of dead flowers) to the office on a milestone birthday. We still laugh about both of these incidents.
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